Who do you spend the most time with?

I often think my early mornings and late nights are spent with my puppies. They need to have a special mention here as the most cuddliest buddies ever! They love a good snuggle and they’re just caring and attentive which is good when you go through moments of intense loneliness.

Whilst I love these little girls to bits and have a few friends I simply adore, this blog will be about my favourite friend to spend time with. My best friend if you will.

When we came to Canberra, Steve took about 6 months to find work. He would get up with me in the mornings and I would leave when I felt I was awake enough. We would go exploring on weekends and weekdays, I would have to call him to remind him that one of the kids or himself had to get somewhere.

We would go for walks or drives and we would enjoy each others company whilst we could grab each others attention. This has been the norm since we met in February 2015. We always wanted to be in each others presence. We have had the most amazing communication since our first phone call that went for 3.5 hours one fateful night before we met in person.

Our entire relationship has been based on open, honest and spontaneous communication, combined with adventures to keep our souls happy, engaged and feeling loved. We have made a pact to make memories and we do a damned good job at keeping that love alive.

In my first year with Steve, we had no kids so we spent a lot of time on his back veranda listening to music and chatting about stuff from our past. To be honest, it was mostly his past. I suppose we knew we had to unpack our baggage to be fully present for each other.

Food was the one thing we always revolved around. Either Steve cooking for me in which I topped the scales at 119.8kgs (to be fair, he cooked for comfort and that is what we both needed at the start of the relationship), or I was creating healthy snacks and meal prepping.

The adventures were always what we lived for though. Going somewhere, making memories, and getting active.

In May of 2019, we said our vows and it hasn’t been until recently that I understood the sheer significance of marriage. We loved each other but it wasn’t until Steve got cancer that stuff really made sense.

Early this year, we started getting information about Steve’s condition that we did not want to hear. We were shocked and there were many tears but we did not give up. Steve had a rare and aggressive squamous cell carcinoma on his face. Skin cancer of the most scary kind.

We could have given up then but I wouldn’t let either of us do that.

The only thing I would allow him to do was fight it and promise to be by his side for everything. It has not been a walk in the park and we have to keep reminding ourselves this is for love and the hope of all the adventures to come.

Steve is now going through 7 weeks of radiation but I still try to get him out of the house to adventure and explore. It keeps him active which will help his recovery and it keeps his mind active which will prevent failure, desperation and desertion.

The one thing I hold dear to my heart is that this man is my soulmate and my companion throughout everything we’ve faced. This is physical and mental on all of us. I’ve lost 15kgs from stress and he’s been vacant until he kicked the post surgery pain medication.

This is Steve today. He is tired, burnt from radiation, nauseas and sometimes vomiting from reflux. But he is, by far, the most amazing adventure buddy that ever did live.

At the end of the day, I spend my time with my husband because he is the very epitome of what I want to see my kids grow up to have in a partner. The cancer treatment is to ensure he sticks around for a good while longer.

I will leave you with this quote for tonight…

“The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it”

CC Scott

Until tomorrow ~ KT18Ø